How to Help Teens Put Less Pressure on Themselves

Many teens feel like they aren’t good enough unless they are at the top of their class and excel in their sport of choice and are the best at the instrument they play and have a ton of friends and have hundreds of “likes” on whatever they post… you get the idea.

Some of this feeling of not being “good enough” comes from comparing themselves with others. It is rooted in our inherent need to belong and be accepted, and it isn’t necessarily good for our mental health.

Comparing oneself to others and striving to be perfect is a recipe for mental health problems. We know from research that self-critical perfectionism, the kind of perfectionism where you set high standards for yourself and criticize yourself when you don’t meet them, where you focus on your failures and constantly doubt yourself, is linked to depression and anxiety. A different kind of perfectionism is what researchers call “personal standards perfectionism”, which is unrelated to depression and anxiety, and simply means setting high goals for yourself without harsh self-criticism.

What can we do? How can we help teens see that it’s possible to have high standards for themselves, while at the same time treating themselves kindly? Click on the link below for more information.

How to Help Teens Put Less Pressure on Themselves (berkeley.edu)

Mrs Annie Williams, College Counsellor