To Eliminate 'I Can't Be Bothered'
To Eliminate 'I Can't Be Bothered'
Explain to children that one of the greatest mistakes they can make is being afraid to make mistakes. Explain that mistakes are a natural part of learning and that while it is good to do the best you can in your work, it is not helpful to insist that everything is done perfectly. Explain that even the greatest scientists and inventors bumble and stumble their way to success. For older children, you can also explain that demanding perfection of oneself leads one to be so worried that it lessens one’s ability to perform well. Encourage students to develop the positive type of thinking called ‘Taking Risks.’ In Taking Risks, a person prefers to do his/her best but accepts that mistakes are inevitable and frequently important as one is learning something new.
Other suggestions for eliminating the need to be perfect:
- Help children become more aware of their perfectionism and its negative effects on their anxiety.
- Have children make a list of the things they always wanted to do but were afraid of not doing perfectly. Encourage students to agree to try one of these activities.
- Encourage children to identify areas of weakness. Have them agree to try activities in these areas. When they have attempted such an activity, point out that they now have evidence that they can tolerate doing things imperfectly.
- Encourage children to stop ruminating about marks and, instead, to get involved in activities unrelated to school.
- Teach children that there is a continuum of achievement and that achievement is not an all (perfection) or nothing (complete failure) outcome. Encourage them to set goals at a place on the achievement continuum where they do not have to be the best in order to learn something and have fun.
- Acknowledge and praise children for attempting things and not doing them perfectly.
Mr David Druery, Head of Staff and Students P-5