Finding Peace Through The Third Way

Usually, when a conflict arises there are two firmly held opposing views.  Finding a peaceful resolution is often more about finding a third way rather than convincing someone that one position is stronger than the other.  Finding the third way involves listening carefully to one another, letting go of judgments and understanding the values and perspectives that each person is bringing to the conversation. Empathy is key in this process.  Learning and teaching young people to pause, suspend judgment and reflect on how the other person might be seeing the situation, helps people to learn to shift from the reactive parts of the brain to the front sections where more complex thinking such as planning, empathy, compassion and self-awareness occurs. Breathing or walking away to think about how to resolve a conflict by considering the other person’s perspectives enables a third way to be found.

A key part of the restorative process conducted at the College is to help people see things from another’s perspective, including understanding the impact of their behaviours on others.  The prayer of St Francis of Assisi reminds us to “seek first to understand”.  Having this as a mantra and praying for God’s help in working through conflict can help us to find the third way, with better outcomes for all and most importantly peace.